In the Midst of This Man

Its difficult to decipher what is real and what is insecurity. Eye find myself having that gut feeling something ain’t right but then I question if its fear of the unknown so I react anxiously instead of acting with ease of what is known. I don’t really know you and you don’t really know me so if you drop off I’m still going to stand right here, strong.

I’m in the midst of this man with the most potential I’ve seen in a long while. After three years I’m ready. Eye am love. He is an emotionally intelligent, musically inclined, curious life learner and he seas me. Honestly I think it’s easy to see me because I’m transparent, sometimes to a fault. “I don’t know how to lie…” eye confess. “You have a kind heart” he smiled, “people have taken advantage of you.” He seas me.

Me: “I asked my tarot cards about you and it said in my future would lay deceit. Are you not single?” I anxiously blurted out.
Him: “no I’m not married.”
Me: “but are you single?”
Him: “yes…my brother is coming in tomorrow with his wife for his birthday. We have stuff to talk about so I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”
Me: “you’re gonna tell me there’s stuff to talk about then hang up on me?”
Him: “yea I need to sleep.”
Tomorrow: silence

Is it the fearless act of transparency that scares men or the desperation to know the truth? I can’t take another lie. Well I can but every lie chips away the very thing you love about me.

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About claritabombita

I recently received my master's degree in social work within the mental health concentration at the University of Illinois at Chicago. Most of my work has been empowering young people ages 12-21 through group therapy, counseling, and case management. I am currently living in Chicago, IL working on balancing my mind, body, and spirit through various indigenous medicine practices and counseling undocumented boys from Mexico who are used by the cartels to smuggle people into the United States. This blog is my journey.

Posted on January 24, 2015, in Chicago, dating, writing and tagged , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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